Ever found yourself hysterically weeping in a fast-food joint’s parking lot, your very best pal simultaneously trying to hand-feed you and keep the hair on your head right back when you yell, “Take myself out! How am I going to ever carry on? I’ll most likely never love again!” through snotty tears? Or are you … not gay?

Ah, heartbreak! The reason tunes tend to be sung and paintings tend to be painted, the determination behind high art like

Romeo and Juliet

and

Red (Taylor’s Type)

. I thought I’d seen almost everything, thought every discomfort. Then again I
started online dating ladies
— and regrettably, something they forget about to mention at Lesbian Orientation usually very first queer breakup will ruin you, in a “should I be hospitalized for this enormous and insurmountable struggling” method of way. Ultimately feeling physically and emotionally attracted (and dedicated) to someone you adore simply hits different.

A few weeks in the past, I found me into the throes of my basic lesbian break up. I break up my ex’s clothing into 1000 pieces, smeared puppy poop around it, and remaining it for them to see in the front property. However retired towards the convenience of personal depression cavern (my sleep) and did exactly what any heartbroken Gen Z–millennial cusp should do mid-breakup: doomscroll on TikTok inside early many hours. But as I unwrapped the software and small FBI guy in my own cellphone shuttled myself straight away to the leading page of Lesbian TikTok, I quickly recognized the sapphic gods hadn’t simply come in my situation — they’d come for us

all

. In terms of queer TikToker Victoria Paris, ”
All white gay ladies are combating!
”

Blame it throughout the
Lesbian Breakup Curse
. Throughout day or two I happened to be unplugged from online world, lying facedown back at my cooking area flooring and experience sorry for me, Lesbian TikTok positively imploded over some high-profile queer breakups that tore the #wlw neighborhood to pieces.

It appears as if all of the TikTok lesbians tend to be splitting up on the other hand, and the crisis makes

Fancy Isle

resemble young child’s play. Based on some, the Curse was
initially cast
when lesbian pop music celebrity Fletcher began teasing a unique track from the woman future album,

Girl of My Personal Desires

. The tune, “Becky’s So Hot,” describes exactly how hot the woman ex’s brand new sweetheart is and suggests that she desires to learn how hot-girl Becky “tastes.” Fletcher’s ex, prominent LGBTQ YouTuber Shannon Beveridge, immediately took to TikTok herself as a result with the tune, clarifying that “not one person questioned permission.” Gay
disorder
ensued.

Abruptly, celebrity partners which range from A-lister
JoJo Siwa
and previous girl Kylie Prew, to college baseball celebrity
Sedona Prince
and former gf Rylee LeGlue happened to be splitting up quicker than they are able to U-Haul to begin with. Plus the gays online were Eating! It! Up! There have been clapback duets, incriminating review
threads
, not very sly visits to
Disneyland
, $80
merch
obtainable,
literal receipts
— just how can a lesbian with a regular job and a screen-time limitation on the cellphone perhaps ever before continue?! Well, I did exactly what any heartbroken lesbian needs to do at one time similar to this: I called out from work, popped a lot of popcorn, took several Klonopin, smashed that “disregard Limit” key, and kept scrolling.

When you come at me personally for reveling from inside the suffering of genuine folks, here is finished .: when you are in your own dark colored spot, it could feel good to watch someone else’s existence break down. If not, how come we see amazing fact shows like

Appreciate Island

or

90 Day Fiancé

? Even an effective traditional rom-com can hit the area. Drama heals drama, and nothing shuts your head down like projecting your own pain and struggling onto innocent Brits exactly who would like to find really love in a villa.

The Lesbian Breakup Curse is over merely a strange (and maybe astrological) sensation seizing the social-media nourishes. It fills a requirement for content material that is relatable, practical, and relevant to the queer society. Whenever I ended up being eventually in a position to secure my personal cellphone, dried out my personal tears, wear some chunky platform shoes, and make the L.A. lesbian bar world by violent storm, the # 1 topic of talk ended up being, predictably, the Curse. It is the Super Bowl.

Lesbian representation when you look at the media is actually minimal (and dubious!) at the best, when considering mindless gay separation content material, it is slender pickings for us queers. This obsession with all the personal dating resides of ebony lesbian women is due to a desperation for actually great homosexual TV. If we had a lesbian online dating show involving carabiners, the Woods on a Wednesday evening, and traveling 12 hrs and three time areas for a first time, we probably wouldn’t need to focus so much on a “curse” which was discussed for all of us on TikTok.

Very certainly, its genuine I happened to be a target with the Lesbian separation Curse (seemingly, it strikes many of those with fewer than 100 supporters on TikTok, also), it pulled me up by the bootstraps, slapped me personally around several times, had gotten me personally through the dog-poop phase, and aided me personally get some necessary perspective. Actually, I think We’ll credit my personal whole data recovery for the Curse — we gays really lift each other right up, do not we? And speaking of training upwards, right stress, no exes happened to be harmed in the authorship of your story. In fact, after half a session of partners therapy and one Phoebe Bridgers show, we aren’t just exes anymore. (Gay, I know.)